This is 911, What is your emergency?

This post is not for the feint of heart. Well, maybe I will include some less gross stuff, but for the most part viewer discretion is advised. My child has some pooing problems. We have all been there, but she has an aversion to pooing. I don't know why this happened, but it is the terrible life that she lives. It is our job as parents to aid my child in her pooing quest. At times when prune juice fails and we are left with no other alternative, we were instructed by our doctor to rectally stimulate the child until she poos. This works, but it is a nasty process that I will not describe on the off chance any readers were still on the fence about having children.

So there we were, Wednesday night, aiding the child's pooing process by the awful torturous methods mentioned above. She was crying (which as an aside she doesn't cry that often when we employ the barbarous tactics which actually worries me a bit) and I decided to hand her my phone because she loves it and it settles her down. She grabbed it and started to chew on it but was still a bit upset and crying. All of the sudden I hear a voice on the phone saying "Hello....Hello?" I think "Oh great, she called one of my speed dials." Kenzie grabbed the phone and all I hear is "I'm sorry. I am trying to make my child poo and I handed her the phone to keep her from crying and she must have dialed 911. No, you don't need to dispatch a car. Thanks." I was amazed. My child knew that she was powerless to stop us but she had enough sense to call in backup. 5.5 months old and she is already smart enough to call the cops on her parents.


In other news, Jarom, Alixa, and Jenna (Nates brother, sister-in-law, and niece) will be moving down to Richmond. Alixa asked me over Thanksiving if there were any openings at my company for a sports administration major. Luckily my boss is pretty incredible (she doesn't read my blog so don't think I am sucking up) and she said that she would take him. He started on Monday and it will be lots of fun having some family around. The team of 6 that I work with are pretty awesome and I am sure that he will fit right in. I am really looking forward to it!

We had a busy week this week. We celebrated our 4 year anniversary on Tuesday night. It was a crazy night for me. I got home, set up some of Kenzie's gifts, went out to dinner with her at a fine local restaurant called Chilis, grabbed 3 hours of sleep and then headed to work for a night shift as we were doing a software upgrade and had to do it at night so that if we messed up the whole hospital wouldn't blow up. It worked very well but I discovered that I am weaksauce and not meant at all for the night shift. I was fine while I was working but I came home at 730 and had to watch the kiddo while Kenzie went to the dentist. Kenna was not impressed with my lack of enthusiasm. Luckily Kenzie got home in time for me to grab a nap. I was so disoriented when I woke up I didn't know what time or day it was. The night shift can have it. No thank you.

Thursday night I got to head to Charlottesville to hang out with Tyler, Amy, Jansen, and a few other locals before the holidays ended. We met up for dinner at a Thai place and had a wonderful time. I sure will miss those guys when they are gone.

She sure does look like her mamma.

We had to drive up to Delaware on Friday morning to avoid the snowstorm and now we are snowed in at grandma's house. There are worse things! We are off to Utah on Sunday to celebrate Christmas with Kenzie's family and Cafe Rio! I am really excited, although not so much for the plane ride.